Why every creative generalist needs a vision for life and how I use mine

Using this to figure out both my parenting style and career choices.

I recently gave birth to my first child.

Ever since, I've had to learn the art of being a parent.

I call it art because a lot of parenting is subjective. Apart from keeping the baby alive, the guidelines on how to raise a child are like a case of crayons with multiple shades of every colour.

Will you breastfeed?
Will you give your newborn a dummy?
Will you start a bedtime routine?

Will you share your bed with your LO (a new abbreviation I learned on Reddit, meaning ‘little one’ - not sure I needed this)?

Will you share nighttime feedings with your partner?
What kind of parenting style will you choose?

The questions are endless.

And most of them don’t have finite answers.

So, what do you do?

Read every book, blog post, and social media feed available and get very confused about what you should be doing?

Or skip all the advice and trust your gut instinct even though you don’t have a clue of what you’re doing?

I came to realise that even though I’ve never had a child before, I can find answers to these questions by looking back at my previous choices.

Hear me out.

When I made the decision to go self-employed, I had a vision for a life that wasn’t dictated by strict working hours.

I wanted to have an active lifestyle where I could go for walks, teach yoga and work with private and corporate coaching clients.

When I made the decision to become fully remote, I had a vision for a life that isn’t limited to a certain location but that allows me to try out a few different places and meet a variety of people. I wanted to be able to live in a small village by the sea without having to be close to a big city to work at an office. I wanted to find people who had chosen a leisurly lifestyle instead of an endless grind.

The guiding motivations for these two choices have been: freedom of time/place, an active lifestyle, and a pursuit for creativity, connection and conscious living.

My vision for life is not a catchy one-liner but more of a vibe.

Now, in this new life situation, I can ask the following questions:

• Are the motivations that I’ve used for previous life choices still relevant for me at this stage of my life?

• If so, how can I implement these in the way I parent my child?

• And, what would that life really look like? Can I identify myself with that vision?

So, how to map out your vision for life?

I understand the word vision in a very literal sense: an image of what we want our lives to look like. A moodboard, if you like (why not Pinterest it?).

If you’re a creative generalist with multiple different job titles, a vision can offer huge relief because it gives you a big picture that you can tie your multiple random pursuits to.

For example, if setting up an corner shop to sell oranges from your garden doesn’t really seem to match your career as a high-profile back-end developer, think again: if your vision is to create a life that challenges both the mind and the body and involves social interaction with total strangers, it totally makes sense! Your little orange shop is part of a larger life narrative about who you are and what you’re creating in this world.

A vision can also help us stay accountable to ourselves and make choices that are aligned with each other.

For example, if I were to choose to become a stay-at-home mum to spend my days taking care of my child and being an active presence in their lives, I wouldn’t – at the same time – be able to have an ambitious career if it means attending every single networking event and working 12-hour days.

Creating a vision is a lot about asking: What do I want my days to look like? What really matters to me and positively contributes to the life I want to live?

Now, if you feel like you don't have a vision for your life, start by looking back at your choices and see how deliberate they’ve been.

Chances are that you do have a vision that has guided your choices but you've just never put it into words.

Or if you realise you're lacking one, it's never too late to start drawing that moodboard.

And remember, I'm not talking about fancy vision statements. It doesn't have to follow a format or sound heroic. But it needs to feel real and be true to you.

You can try the following questions to get started:

• What type of life do you believe in or admire?

• Which choices in your past have made you the happiest?

• What kind of experiences would you like to have in this lifetime and with whom?

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I hope this gives you some food for thought.

And, to anyone that might be interested: I said yes to breastfeeding, dummies, and a nighttime routine, and no to bed-sharing. I do nighttime feedings myself and I’m still on the drawing board when it comes to my parenting style.

Keep me posted on your visions for life in the comments below or via email.

And use this opportunity to become the hope you wish to feel in this world.

With kindness,
Aurora